It is well known that understanding ourselves and the psyche of the people around us plays an important role in determining our personal happiness. We all suffer quite a lot from convictions acquired over previous experiences and the disincentives we deal with every day, which make our lives less easy than expected.
Sometimes we think we are not good enough because we didn’t reach a certain goal in our lives at that moment which identified in advance, and this leads to a fear of failure or simply of society’s evaluations of us.
But prior to the completion of anything we need to start first with better psychology to correct our thoughts and perceptions while reducing the accumulated negative in which we see ourselves.
These five critical rules will help you to see yourself and the world more simply if you can make these rules as a permanent habit in your life.
1. Your advice and experiences will not always be heard, so don’t be upset
You may find your dear friend in real trouble and you know exactly what he needs to do to get out of this dilemma with minimal losses, while you are trying to advise him what to do, but in vain.
You might be really frustrated because first and foremost you want to help and fear the consequences.
In fact, he won’t take your advice as long as he can’t see the exact same thing with the same mentality. Therefore, his mind and point of view must change first, and this won’t be done with advice on a silver platter, but he will need to test the matter himself through his own experiences and build up his personal knowledge.
So, dear reader, do not be sad or exhaust yourself with an undue feeling that you are unimportant or neglected, you have done your simple role with advice and now let him discover what you said.
2. You can control your reaction only
You can’t control all the negative situations and events you face every day, but you can control your reaction. Try taking yourself for a few seconds outside of this provocative situation before you make any reaction, maybe its results disturb you the whole day, not to mention the consequences of this annoying matter which can be exacerbated while you are dispensable for all this.
These few seconds will train your mind to cope with these future situations smoothly and flexibly.
3. Comparison is useless (stop comparing yourself to others)
In the presence of intensive social media and, especially it has become an integral part of many people’s lives, which in turn motivate them unconsciously to share their wonderful moments. This creates a fake and unreal image that their whole life going this way and that their lives immersed in bliss while your life full of obstacles, then you begin an undesirable comparison about imperfect realities and life except on the virtual reality.
Even in real life, we tend to show the bright sides of our lives, mean to hide the flaws and disadvantages for fear of being judged or rejected by others.
Actually, we all have the same degree of weakness. Therefore, it is foolish and complete waste of time to believe that someone is better than us and his life stable, while our lives struggling with obstacles.
The comparison and the feeling that we are less fortunate than some of them is horrible and useless because even all those strong and whom we think they are lucky, have a lot of anxiety and fear inside them.
4. We are constantly changing
You probably noticed this feeling well at some point that your past self is different from your current self, and will definitely differ from the future according to the several data you deal with, the surrounding circumstances around you and your endless experiences, which eventually will create your mentality.
for of all this, you have to be honest with yourself when you make a decision or step forward away from the prison of the past and future worries. We can’t predict how our future selves will think and feel about this or that matter.
And also everything happened in the past is not about us, it belongs to that past self which died. Intellectual and psychological effectiveness must be for the present time only.
5. People don’t really care
This fact may seem a bit harsh at first, but truly it is inevitable fact, if you realize this correctly it will be very convenient. Being trapped in the corner of others’ expectations, and all our actions become an answer to a question, what people think of me, the life will be a hell. This conduct will cause systematic psychological destruction; because people don’t care about our lives completely if so it will be nothing but common things we all share.
Keep these words in your mind; most of what we think about people’s thoughts of us are just assumptions created by our minds based on our previous experiences, or on incorrect perceptions and interpretations.
To be yourself without putting any prior considerations on others’ reactions and expectations about you will your first and essential step in your personal happiness.